Tuesday, January 31, 2017

Disaster Time

Okay, here's an update on my son.  The doc sends my son home 2 days early.  My son can't even walk yet and the muscle spasms are constant.  Yep, he didn't make it 24 hours and we're calling and ambulance and headed for the ER.  Why is my son screaming in pain?  I do not know.  The ER did a CT scan and they see an unusual amount of fluid in the abdominal cavity.  So, here we go again.  I've lost another day of paycheck (starting to worry about losing my job now) and another 150 mile drive, this time following an ambulance.   The nurses are working on him, the floor on call Dr has been through.  This is going to be a looong, uncomfortable night.

So, if anybody is in the St Louis area, give me a shout, I could use a little company and a prayer partner......

Friday, January 27, 2017

Thank you

Thank you all who said prayers for us.  I'm in tears.  Debbie, Barbara, Patti and Carol, you ladies saved me.  I could not have got him there without you.  God bless.

The boy is already walking!  Well, a few steps is all they'd let him try but still, it's upright!  Wish I was there instead of at work.  Gotta be done tho.....

Start of the long road

So here we are, on the recovery side of the surgery.  I feel like a truck ran me over.  My son has a long road ahead of him.  We both do.  First thing, first appointment yesterday, pre surgery thing to mark him for the ostomy, the haughty witch receptionist wouldn't give me a parking validation ticket.  Oh yah, I had a high speed come apart all over her.  My son's nurse saved me bail money tho and I got the $15 parking fee waived.  Talk about robbing the captive audience.... Anyhoooo, we got him marked up and over to the other side and another parking lot on time.  The surgical team did Thier job and my son is resting.   I'm off to a 12 hour work shift......

Wednesday, January 25, 2017

One more day

There's this one more day I have to get through.  I'm getting ready to go to work and my stomach is in a knot.  I feel like hurling.  I will work until midnight, drive home, take a shower, try to eat something and then get back in the car to pick my son up and take him to st Louis for the surgery.   This day is already terrible.  I feel like I'm stuck in a bad dream.  I need to be tending the goats.  There's 12 pregnant nanny's out there wondering where the feed is.  My daughter came down yesterday and she helped me catch up one that is limping badly.  I have not been out to the barn yet today.  First time in my life I don't want to be in the barn.  I'm afraid that the goat is dead.  That's just how I feel like my life is going.  How sorry and pathetic is that?  I'm feeling pretty beat down right now.

Monday, January 23, 2017

Miserable days

this is horrible, miserable, heartbreaking and all the rest of the dismal adjectives.  These doctors want to basically gut my son like a fish.  The appointments 2 and 3 times a week with what seems like no regard for the time off work, lost income, hours of driving, them not even having the courtesy to show up for those appointments that were so important....  

I need a little help.  This is going to be a very long and unpleasant road I must travel down.  I have no choice.  I will be making a page for my son in the next few days.  I will be rounding up things from the farm to offer up to help raise funds to get him to his chemotherapy treatments and help with his bills and his baby son.  Also, if you pray, please add us to your prayers.

Monday, January 2, 2017

The final straw

This year has been a nightmare for me.  Just as I was finally getting a tiny bit ahead, all manner of hell broke loose here.

  The job loss, the kids problems, juggling the bills with no job, Dad getting sick, the ex robbing me while I was at dad's funeral, auntie passing a week after dad, the clutch going out on the truck and now, a cancer diagnosis for my 22 yr old son.

I'm done.  There's no more left in me.