Sunday, April 16, 2017

Happy Easter

Eh, I'm sitting here, crochet needle in hand, working on a gift for Pamit.  Grandson is with me today, his daddy napping in the recliner.  Hahaha, I free ranged him so I could get some gardening work done!  Taught the little bub how to get down the porch stairs not face first.  He's a smart little feller, he got it almost instantly and went up and down a dozen times to " show" me he could.  Not scared of the grass like his daddy was, he took off straight away chasing chickens with Grandma close behind!

Life here has been turned on its ear, most of my livestock are sold off.  Cancer is costing me everything.  Topping that off, my current employer has lost their contract with the major tire producer I've been working for.  New company taking over and I'm not too thrilled with them.  I am torn between working for them(not trusting them to not use me to train new staff and then let me go) and taking the unemployment package from my current employer.  I've been searching the job market for the last month, not found anything yet.  I've got a week left.  Topping that off is the mess going on with the grandson.  His momma (womb donor) can't stop dumping him on anyone who will take him and I'm tired of being extorted for money with threats of "you'll never see him again unless you give me money".  OMG, it's a horror story and the poor baby is the victim.  My son has finally stood up and put his foot down.  Filed for parental custody.  Thank God!  That girl needs stopped.

I'm working on getting the farm cleaned up so I can possibly sell it to someone.  Anyone actually.  My son's health is sucking every dime from me and it's farming or the cancer.

Oh!  Let me tell you about what happened to me at work last week Saturday night!  Co-worker had a dumpster on the hook (in between the forks and rotated) and I walked over to help him out.  As I reached in to pull the fabric strips we needed to bake out of it, the dumpster fell off the forks, shifted and fell on me.  Split my head wide open, smashed my shoulder and elbow, pinned me to the floor by me steel toe boot.  Oh yah, I bled like a slaughtered hog.  So, I get to the ER (Good Sam in Mt vernon- aka clown show) for a head CT.  Apparently, I have a head like a rock.  The nurse comes in with a plastic tub, towel, a few bottles of only she knows what and a scrub brush.  Now, mind you, I have a football sized heamatoma on my head, above my right eye and I'm dripping blood.  She says to me," I'm gonna scrub your head so we can put some staples in it".  I look at here, then that toilet brush she had in her hand and I reply " oh no.  No you will not".  Double hell no.  She says but it will leave a scar.  I just bust out laughing.  Really?  Okay, just you fill out that paperwork, I gotta go.  No scull fracture, yup, I'm leaving.  She tells me I need pain killers and antibiotics.  Yep, I start laughing again.  Poor lady don't know what to do.  I'm say " okay, I need a tetanus shot" just because I know HR will want me to get one(those dumpsters are a bit nasty,) and wouldn't ya know it, Good Sam does not have a tetanus shot on the premises!  Yep, time for me to go.  But wait, can't go yet, the front desk mishandled the mandatory drug screen sample, I gotta pre in the cup again.  Geez, I'm never getting out of there!  Sigh, okay, let's do this.  Done, signed out and drove myself home.  It's been a week, no piss, no infection, no tetanus and no narcotics.  Almost healed, still a small lump of blood to absorb and mild pain at the trauma site.  I didn't look any hair and no frickin staples.

Yep, never a full moment.......

Thursday, February 2, 2017

Fund raising auction

Well, Shawn is on his way home from his return visit to the hospital.  The surgery was just the beginning for him.  The surgery was simply to remove some tumors blocking his colon along with a section that was bleeding.  Shawn still has tumors all over inside him and we still have a long way to go.  He's unemployed, his fiance is unemployed now too.  We've got to find them and the baby somewhere to live.  We've still got Dr appointments to go to, still have to treat the cancer.

I don't have much to offer and the paycheck is simply not even close to enough.  All I have right now is a couple crocheted blankets.  Here's one for raffle.  $5 a ticket in the hat.  Help my son thru the next couple weeks.

This one is called grape fizz and it's 3' by 6'.
Use the donate button on the right or comment for an address to mail to.
Share this please, and good luck!

Tuesday, January 31, 2017

Disaster Time

Okay, here's an update on my son.  The doc sends my son home 2 days early.  My son can't even walk yet and the muscle spasms are constant.  Yep, he didn't make it 24 hours and we're calling and ambulance and headed for the ER.  Why is my son screaming in pain?  I do not know.  The ER did a CT scan and they see an unusual amount of fluid in the abdominal cavity.  So, here we go again.  I've lost another day of paycheck (starting to worry about losing my job now) and another 150 mile drive, this time following an ambulance.   The nurses are working on him, the floor on call Dr has been through.  This is going to be a looong, uncomfortable night.

So, if anybody is in the St Louis area, give me a shout, I could use a little company and a prayer partner......

Friday, January 27, 2017

Thank you

Thank you all who said prayers for us.  I'm in tears.  Debbie, Barbara, Patti and Carol, you ladies saved me.  I could not have got him there without you.  God bless.

The boy is already walking!  Well, a few steps is all they'd let him try but still, it's upright!  Wish I was there instead of at work.  Gotta be done tho.....

Start of the long road

So here we are, on the recovery side of the surgery.  I feel like a truck ran me over.  My son has a long road ahead of him.  We both do.  First thing, first appointment yesterday, pre surgery thing to mark him for the ostomy, the haughty witch receptionist wouldn't give me a parking validation ticket.  Oh yah, I had a high speed come apart all over her.  My son's nurse saved me bail money tho and I got the $15 parking fee waived.  Talk about robbing the captive audience.... Anyhoooo, we got him marked up and over to the other side and another parking lot on time.  The surgical team did Thier job and my son is resting.   I'm off to a 12 hour work shift......

Wednesday, January 25, 2017

One more day

There's this one more day I have to get through.  I'm getting ready to go to work and my stomach is in a knot.  I feel like hurling.  I will work until midnight, drive home, take a shower, try to eat something and then get back in the car to pick my son up and take him to st Louis for the surgery.   This day is already terrible.  I feel like I'm stuck in a bad dream.  I need to be tending the goats.  There's 12 pregnant nanny's out there wondering where the feed is.  My daughter came down yesterday and she helped me catch up one that is limping badly.  I have not been out to the barn yet today.  First time in my life I don't want to be in the barn.  I'm afraid that the goat is dead.  That's just how I feel like my life is going.  How sorry and pathetic is that?  I'm feeling pretty beat down right now.

Monday, January 23, 2017

Miserable days

this is horrible, miserable, heartbreaking and all the rest of the dismal adjectives.  These doctors want to basically gut my son like a fish.  The appointments 2 and 3 times a week with what seems like no regard for the time off work, lost income, hours of driving, them not even having the courtesy to show up for those appointments that were so important....  

I need a little help.  This is going to be a very long and unpleasant road I must travel down.  I have no choice.  I will be making a page for my son in the next few days.  I will be rounding up things from the farm to offer up to help raise funds to get him to his chemotherapy treatments and help with his bills and his baby son.  Also, if you pray, please add us to your prayers.

Monday, January 2, 2017

The final straw

This year has been a nightmare for me.  Just as I was finally getting a tiny bit ahead, all manner of hell broke loose here.

  The job loss, the kids problems, juggling the bills with no job, Dad getting sick, the ex robbing me while I was at dad's funeral, auntie passing a week after dad, the clutch going out on the truck and now, a cancer diagnosis for my 22 yr old son.

I'm done.  There's no more left in me.